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Achy, breaky windows

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By The Staff

Achy, breaky windows

SOUTH JEFFCO — Apparent jealousy manifested itself in two broken windows last week. A man was watching TV about 2 a.m. when he heard a pane of glass in his front door shatter. When a deputy arrived, the man said he had rushed outside and didn’t see anything or anyone, but speculated that a guy bitter because a girl likes him better broke the window. He told the deputy where he thought the guy lived, but didn’t know any other information about him. The deputy went over to the area where the heartbroken man was supposed to have lived and didn’t find anything. While he was gone, another window — this time the bathroom window — was breached with a rock, leaving a baseball-size hole. The deputy came back to the house and tried to investigate, but the only thing learned is that a broken heart can, at times, lead to broken windows.

Two-way trouble at a four-way

SOUTH JEFFCO — Snowboarding injuries be damned, running a four-way stop is not OK. A man claimed that the reason a sheriff’s deputy saw him run the four-way stop was because the driver had “screwed up my shoulder snowboarding and just downshifted to second and coasted through.” Wow. To add insult to his shoulder injury, when the man looked for his proof and insurance and registration in the glove box, the deputy noticed a bit of pot. The man quickly closed the glove box and said he didn’t have his documents, but it was too late, and the eagle-eyed deputy had already seen the goods. The man gave up his pot and said, “Can you give me a break? It’s Thanksgiving, and I forgot I even had any dope left. I haven’t smoked any (marijuana) today, and my shoulder is killing me.” The deputy did give him a break in that he cited the man only for possession of less than 1 ounce of marijuana and issued a verbal warning for running the four-way stop.

Stranger in a strange vehicle

SOUTH JEFFCO — When visiting from out of town, it’s usually a good idea to have your friends drive you around, not the other way around. A man learned that lesson the hard way last week after a Jeffco sheriff’s deputy stopped him early in the morning when his southbound vehicle was straddling the white line on South Pierce Street. The man, visiting from Wyoming, admitted to consuming five beers during the night, but said that although he shouldn’t have been driving, he had to get his friends home. His Jeep was towed, and he spent the night in jail. Hopefully, for his sake, his friends at least bonded him out of jail the next day and helped him get home.